Watch me run.

Fact:

Sat, 18 May 2013 18:00:27 -0500

If the life you are currently living is the exact opposite of, and keeping you from, the life you want…you’re probably doing it wrong.

Be right back guys, I’m getting myself together.

Today was spent buying Hawaii essentials. Yes, these were on the...

Fri, 17 May 2013 23:25:19 -0500

Today was spent buying Hawaii essentials. Yes, these were on the list. I’ve joined the adventure side. #chacos #6weeks

Currently researching. Holy hell I’m going to be in Hawaii...

Fri, 17 May 2013 10:49:44 -0500

Currently researching.

Holy hell I’m going to be in Hawaii in six weeks, for eleven days.

SIX WEEKS. ELEVEN DAYS.

4.5 days in Maui. 6.5 days in Oahu.

Scuba diving, Road to Hana-ing, hiking, camping, snorkeling, pearl harbor-ing, beach-ing, luau-ing, catamaran-ing. Cue freak out.

I’ve been saving up for this trip for over a year now. I can’t comprehend all of the awesome that is going to be happening.

It's hard to keep giving parts of yourself away and not lose who you are.

Thu, 16 May 2013 15:07:27 -0500

My entire life has been about giving things up. About putting everyone else before myself. About worrying about everyone else’s feelings while convincing myself I was fine. I have such a problem with speaking my mind.

It’s hard for me to look at someone and tell them, “no, I’m not okay” and tell them exactly what’s on my mind, and it’s especially hard to tell them I want something that I know they don’t. I spare everyone else’s feelings at the risk of hurting my own.

I just..I just want to be the girl who says what’s on her mind. Who isn’t petrified about speaking up for herself. I have entire conversations in my head. I map out exactly what I want to say, and then the time comes to say it and all I manage is “it’s nothing”, “it’s fine”, or “don’t worry about it”.

I don’t want to burden anyone with what’s in my mind and in the process, I throw what I want out. Let what I want to say be forgotten. It’s not fair to anyone, but mostly it’s not fair to me. I deserve to be heard. To matter.

I’m tired of being the person people come to to complain, the good listener, but when it’s my turn, I get ignored. I’m tired of people thinking it’s okay to only come to me when they need something, because they know I’ll do it for them. I’m tired of being the push around. I’m tired of being scared that what I think has no worth behind it.

There’s a difference in wanting to help everyone and unhealthily ignoring your wants for everyone else’s. Yes, the people in my life are important, but I still need to be my number one.

I’m worth the happiness. I’m worth the courage it takes to stick up for yourself. I’m worth everything I want out of my life. It’s time I learn that, and it’s time I show everyone else that.

This song will be on repeat for a really really long time.

Wed, 15 May 2013 21:57:06 -0500

This song will be on repeat for a really really long time.

I’ve always been afraid to go places alone. To shop alone....

Wed, 15 May 2013 13:10:08 -0500

I’ve always been afraid to go places alone. To shop alone. Eat at a restaurant alone. And mostly: go to the movies alone.

I always see someone out alone and my instinct is to feel bad for them. It always doesn’t pop in my mind that maybe they just wanted to see a dang movie by themselves. Or just go eat somewhere and enjoy relaxing alone.

Im at the movies with the coolest person I know and thus, today will be known as the first time I went to a movie alone.

All my years of sweatin’ to the oldies with Richard...

Mon, 13 May 2013 19:16:33 -0500

All my years of sweatin’ to the oldies with Richard Simmons did not prepare me for Zumba. So much sweat, and so much fun!

Me thinks I’ll try again tomorrow.

My scuba instructor said chocolate milk is really good after...

Sun, 12 May 2013 13:26:34 -0500

My scuba instructor said chocolate milk is really good after being underwater.

No complaints.

Who am I to not listen to a professional?

And so begins the adventure to get scuba certified. I am...

Sat, 11 May 2013 10:10:17 -0500

And so begins the adventure to get scuba certified. I am TERRIFIED. 🐙🐠🐟🐬🐳🐋🌊🌊🌊

Getting it done on a Friday night. This workout brought to you...

Sat, 11 May 2013 00:02:00 -0500

Getting it done on a Friday night.

This workout brought to you by Spice Girls pandora, guaranteed instant gym time party! Pretty sure I looked like this on the elliptical. NO SHAME.

Goodnight! In the morning, I scuba (in a pool, but stil!).

Dear tumblr lovelies, Thank you for all of the love on my...

Fri, 10 May 2013 18:01:00 -0500

Dear tumblr lovelies,

Thank you for all of the love on my progress pic. I am floored.

Thank you for always motivating me to get my butt off the couch and to the gym. Thank you for pushing me to better myself by being inspirations. And thank you for following along on my journey. It’s the best feeling in the world knowing I can come to this little corner of the Internet and be amongst like minded, and amazing people.

People who understand that running isn’t just a form of torture. People that love workout clothes more than regular clothes. That find challenging themselves as a fun thing to do. People that see a limit, and push past it, because they know they can. Who understand that burpees and planks are in fact the devil, but do them anyway.

This community is just the bee’s knees. It puts a pep in my step. You guys are my sunshine. Y’all are the apple(s) of my eye. I love this community more than I love frozen yogurt, and you guys know that’s an insane amount.

I just have all the feels for you guys, okay?

My knee has decided to not play nice, so it’s a rest night...

Thu, 09 May 2013 22:38:18 -0500

My knee has decided to not play nice, so it’s a rest night for me.

Which brings me to…froyo treat Thursday!!!!! And High School Musical. Because, why not?

Rock and roll baby.

Throwback Thursday, progress edition. The left? My 19th birthday...

Thu, 09 May 2013 16:49:00 -0500

Throwback Thursday, progress edition.

The left? My 19th birthday (2008). About two years before I started this journey.

The right? Me on Monday.

Sometimes it’s hard to see the difference. When I looked at these two photos, I talked myself into believing they weren’t really that different. It took me a few looks, to finally see it. And that’s insane. It’s time to look back, realize how hard I’ve worked to get where I am today, and pat myself on the back. No one did this for me. No one forced the healthy foods into my mouth. And no one got behind me and pushed me when I went running. I am strong. And capable. And I’m starting to realize that again. And it’s so gratifying. And amazing.

It’s insane what hard work, motivation, and determination can do.

Because apparently running wasn’t enough for one day....

Wed, 08 May 2013 23:44:31 -0500

Because apparently running wasn’t enough for one day. Decided to throw in some spin, elliptical, and stair master.

Brought my calorie burn for the day to almost 900. SAHWEET!

This girl is going to sleep gooooood tonight.

Today marks the first time running outside in Chicagoland, as...

Wed, 08 May 2013 15:35:17 -0500

Today marks the first time running outside in Chicagoland, as well as my first outside run since February.

And it was lovely. I’m so glad Illinois has traded in its dead/brown look for all of the green. This park was so pretty! I think I’m in love.

A slow, heavy legged 2 miles is complete. They weren’t my best, but I wouldn’t trade them for anything.

After I sat under a tree for a little reading and my heart just could not be happier with what a lovely afternoon I had.

Oh, outdoor running…I’ve missed you badly.

I'm not one to gush, but seriously...

Tue, 07 May 2013 18:15:25 -0500

my boyfriend is just the best. I couldn’t be more blessed or more lucky to have someone that cares about me, and takes care of me, the way he does. And I absolutely could not imagine not having him in my life.

I’m the happiest happy happy girl there ever was.

/end of gush fest.

Nothing like a late night gym session to get you going to bed in...

Tue, 07 May 2013 00:29:21 -0500

Nothing like a late night gym session to get you going to bed in the right mindset. A little bit of cycle, stair master, treadmill, and elliptical action and BOOM 600+ calories gone pecan.

This workout was brought to you by Demi Lovato’s new cd, because I have the best taste in music. Obviously.

Tomorrow will be good. Why? Because I said so, dangit.

Nobody's perfect, you live and you learn it.

Mon, 06 May 2013 16:07:35 -0500

Yep, I just titled this after Hannah Montana.

I’ve been thinking a lot about Brenna’s response to how we view food. About how it’s our brains that are wrong, the enemy, not food.

Today included, these past few days I have not been on point eating wise. And I’m tired of feeling bad about it. I’m not supposed to be a machine who only eats all the veggies, fruits, and whole foods. I can’t be expected of going from one unhealthy extreme, to another healthy one. And it’s okay.

Food doesn’t need to be a battle. It shouldn’t be. And I’m not going to let it anymore. I ate bad foods, so what? They were delicious. It didn’t unravel everything I’ve worked for thus far. And it’s no reason to throw in the towel. My life isn’t going to end after the choices I made. There is no deadline to being healthy. No end point.

Which brings me to dietbet. I don’t think I like them. I’ve been nothing but stressed since I started. That number I need to be at Saturday has been in the back of my mind every day. And it’s not healthy. I’ve hopped on the scale multiple times every day. And whenever that number isn’t where I want it to be, I beat myself up.

And that’s not how I want this journey to be. I want it to be about pushing myself. Having fun making myself better. Exploring new things. Adventure time USA. Because the second it starts being bad, is the second I want to quit.

And counting calories? Not for me. I get obsessed about it and get to the point where I stress out over my food choices every day.

So there’s going to be some shake ups coming up, things I need to learn about myself. Fix. The mental battle is gearing up, and it’s about time.

Stay tuned everyone.

This is what you have for Cinco de Mayo when you’re craving home...

Sun, 05 May 2013 19:55:50 -0500

This is what you have for Cinco de Mayo when you’re craving home foods. Roast beef po boy made from scratch.

Nola proud. Nola love.

**if you submit a friend application (see previous post) you will be subjected to these foods and more. You’re welcome**

Chicagoland/anyone willing to drive to me

Sun, 05 May 2013 18:31:05 -0500

Currently taking applications for someone to come watch movies, drink wine, and order a Lou Malnati’s pizza with me.

Awkward silences would probably happen.